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120 Toxic Co-Parenting Quotes To Help You Deal With It

120 Toxic Co-Parenting Quotes To Help You Deal With It

Have you been feeling stuck and helpless in a toxic co-parenting situation? If so, then take a look at this great collection of toxic co-parenting quotes that will help you cope.

A toxic co-parenting relationship is tough. Divorced parents are faced with a situation where all the negative feelings and bitter memories between them make it really hard to cooperate for the sake of their children.

A separation can get really ugly. Once the stressful divorce procedures are over and kids start to spend time with each parent separately, parents start to feel like they’re missing out on their child’s life.

The collection of toxic co-parenting quotes you’ll find in this article speaks about just how hard it can be.

These inspirational quotes will help you realize that finding a common parenting goal with your ex is the most important thing you can do for your children.

Let’s dive into my motivational list of toxic co-parenting quotes!

20 Best Toxic Co-Parenting Quotes

These are the best co-parenting quotes by notable people and celebrities who have navigated this parenting situation. I believe they will give you the strength you need to manage co-parenting with your ex a little better.

1. “Co-parenting is not a competition. It’s a collaboration of two homes working together with the best interest of the child at heart. Work for your kids, not against them.” — Heather Hetchler

Co-parenting is not a competition

2. “Once you do embark upon the separation or divorce process, it is very important to remember three key things: Be kind, be reasonable, be brief. Remember that this person will no longer be your spouse. But he or she will continue to be your co-parent, family member, and perhaps a business partner in certain assets and entities.” — Laura Wasser

3. “It’s about prioritizing. Just take it one step at a time. Do the best you can. I’m a mom and I have two husbands—an ex-husband and a next husband. It’s a blended family and it’s very hard to keep things together, but we’re happy and we live in love.” — Kimora Lee Simmons

4. “You have to get to that point as a divorced parent, where you’re not putting yourself first. You want the kid’s experience to be its own and not like, ‘Well, I need to have my time!’ We have been very good about that.” — Ryan Phillipe

5. “At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of the parents.” — Jane D. Hull

At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of the parents

6. “The best security blanket a child can have is parents who respect each other.” — Jane Blaustone

7. “It’s not only children who grow. Parents do too! As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can’t tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself.” — Joyce Maynard

8. “We are both totally committed to raising our son and being in love with our son… It’s a concept that’s fairly new, particularly in the psychology of raising a child in a divorce. And the idea is, it’s really not the child’s fault that you got divorced. It’s your fault, and therefore, it should not be the child’s problem to go back and forth between two different homes.” — Josh Lucas on the “bird nesting” co-parenting arrangement.

9. “It’s not your job to create the perfect life for your kids. It is not your job to keep them happy all the time. In good times, hard times, normal times, crazy times, sad times, and great times. Show up. Be firm. Love much and mother well.” — Rachel Marie Martin

10. “We both realize that we’re parents and we’re in it for our kid, and that’s made it really easy.” — Pete Wentz

We both realize that we’re parents and we’re in it for our kid, and that’s made it really easy

11. “Children do not care about child support, who was married to whom, or why you don’t like each other. They are children; they care that their parents show-up. That when there is a Christmas recital, and they peek through the curtains, all of the people they love are there, without fighting for the best interest of the child.” — Jessica James

12. “We divided and conquered together with lots of calendar coordination along the way. If one of us had to travel for work, we made sure the other was home. Our kids didn’t care who was home as long as one of us was there, and we never missed important moments.” — Shelley Zalis

13. “Leave your pride, ego, and narcissism somewhere else. Reactions from those parts of you will reinforce your children’s most primitive fears.” — Henry Cloud

14. “I think, unfortunately, though we couldn’t stay in a romantic relationship…our values are very much around the importance of family and the importance of those relationships, and I’m lucky that we’re aligned in that way. And it’s been hard, and you know, like, we’ve gone through really difficult times with it, but we’ve always said these children are our priority.” — Gwyneth Paltrow

15. “Think of it as an important business project; you don’t always love the person that you’re working with, but you work together to get the project done. Co-parents need to adopt this same business model when co-parenting their children.” — Kela Price

Co-parents need to adopt this same business model when co-parenting their children

16. “Do I believe in coupling? Do I believe in commitment? Do I believe in co-parenting, raising children together, having a family, and growing old with someone? I absolutely believe in all of those things. I just don’t believe that you need to be married to do that. I love going to weddings, though. I do love a good wedding.” — Laura Wasser

17. “At the end of the day, you’ve got to be a little selfless. You have to say ‘It’s not about us. This didn’t work out quite how we wanted it to, but look at the amazing blessing that we have in these wonderful children.’ So you kinda put everything else to the side and really focus.” — Nick Cannon

18. “I’m really fortunate because my ex and I are very good friends and I talk to him every day. Our daughter is growing up, seeing two people who care about each other. We may not be a traditional family on paper, but we are a family, and I tell her that families come in all shapes and sizes, but [a family is] love, and I see her really flourishing because she sees two people treating each other with respect.” — Angela Kinsey

19. “I have pictures up of Wiz and me in [our son’s] room so he can always come in and see us being happy together. We try to have family days with him, even though we’re not together. Kids want to see their parents together, and if you can’t be together in a relationship, you’ve got to come together as friends for your baby.” — Amber Rose

20. “Parental alienation is an emotional act of violence that is aimed at an adult, but critically wounds a child.” — Steve Maraboli

Parental alienation is an emotional act of violence that is aimed at an adult, but critically wounds a child

Quotes About Co-Parenting With A Toxic Ex-Partner

Shared parenting is really hard, but if you are forced to do this kind of parenting with a person who is toxic, then you have to face one of the biggest challenges. The following toxic co-parenting quotes paint a perfect picture of how hard it is to cooperate with a toxic ex.

1. “Co-parenting with a toxic ex is challenging and frustrating at best and impossible at worst.”

Co-parenting with a toxic ex is challenging and frustrating at best and impossible at worst

2. “You can’t collaborate with someone who refuses to collaborate. Start parallel parenting: Keep strict boundaries, communicate only over big-ticket items such as medical care and education, and interact minimally, even if that means having separate birthday parties.” — Virginia Gilbert

3. “Regardless of your personal feelings about your ex, your children need a healthy connection with their other parent. Keep snide comments to yourself, and don’t discuss your parenting frustration with your children. Help build their relationship by allowing phone calls, sending birthday cards, and letters when your co-parent is at a distance.”

4. “Co-parenting with a psychopath is a special kind of hell.”

5. “Don’t ever talk trash to a child about their other parent. After all, you found some good in them long enough to reproduce.”

Don’t ever talk trash to a child about their other parent.

6. “If you choose to have a child with someone you automatically chose to be a parent with that person, you don’t get the right to change your mind just because it didn’t turn out the way you expected it to. You still have to be a parent with the other person. DO what’s best for your child, not what’s best for you.”

7. “Dear Deadbeat Dads, if you don’t spend any time with your kids when they’re young, don’t be surprised when they don’t want to spend any time with you when they are old enough to see what kind parent you are.”

8. “We begin to understand that to co-parent is to one day look up and notice that you are on a roller coaster with another human being. You are in the same car, strapped down side by side and you can never, ever get off. There will never be another moment in your lives when your hearts don’t rise and fall together, when your stomach doesn’t churn in tandem, when you stop seeing huge hills emerge in the distance and simultaneously grab the sides of the car and hold on tight. No one except for the one strapped down beside you will ever understand the particular thrills and terrors of your ride.”

9. “The best, most mature co-parents will tell their therapist and not their child-how much the other parent sucks.”

10. “The family drama may look and sound different from generation to generation, but all toxic patterns are remarkably similar in their outcome: pain and suffering.”

The family drama may look and sound different from generation to generation

11. “I also believe that forgiveness is appropriate only when parents do something to earn it. Toxic parents, especially the more abusive ones, need to acknowledge what happened, take responsibility, and show a willingness to make amends.”

12. “As long as you continue to react so strongly to them, you give them the power to upset you, which allows them to control you.”

13. “They’ll stab you in the lungs and then ask why you’re having trouble breathing.”

14. “Love should be energizing. It should encourage us to be a better version of ourselves. But toxic partners, on the contrary, make us feel weak, exhausted and powerless. We should be learning, working and growing. But instead, we are too tired to do so because the relationship has drained us.”

15. “Instead of promoting healthy development, they unconsciously undermine it, often with the belief that they are acting in their child’s best interest.”

Instead of promoting healthy development, they unconsciously undermine it, often with the belief that they are acting in their child’s best interest

16. “They will make you second guess yourself by stripping away your self-worth and self-esteem.”

17. “Until a man lets himself heal, he will be toxic to every woman who tries to.”

Co-parenting with a Narcissist Quotes

Shared parenting with a narcissist is really frustrating. These people and their actions may endanger the child’s mental health. If you are forced to co-parent with such a person, you need to take charge to prevent any turmoil your ex-partner may create.

Here are some good toxic co-parenting quotes about narcissism to give you the motivation to manage this situation.

1. “A narcissist will never co-parent. They will counter-parent. They don’t care about the emotional damage that constant drama inflicts upon the children as long as it causes emotional drama to you.” — A.Price

A narcissist will never co-parent

2. “The narcissistic parents completely brainwash the conformer (golden child). Realize that you cannot save them from the parent. The conformer becomes so programmed that they take on the traits of the narcissistic parent. Your relationship with them becomes just as toxic.”

3. “Narcissists will steamroll over others to get what they want, so you must be vigilant about enforcing your boundaries. Refer to court orders, don’t respond immediately to texts and emails, and don’t allow your ex to intrude on your visitation time with frequent calls and texts to your children.”

4. “Stop drinking the kool-aid that every divorced couple should be able to co-parent. If you have a relentlessly high-conflict Ex, try parallel parenting instead, different houses, different rules, and as little contact as possible.” — Virginia Gilbert

5. “Narcissists have a little interest or empathy in anyone but themselves, and for a child, it can be extremely damaging.”

Narcissists have a little interest or empathy in anyone but themselves

6. “For a narcissist, co-parenting is never going to be about the well-being of the children. It’s always going to be about you. Oddly enough, we can use this fact to gain back power.” — Zari Ballard

7. “You are healing, and that terrifies them. They’ve never met a woman who can break several times and put herself back together using nothing but self-love.”

8. “You were a narcissistic wife; you’re now a narcissistic ex-wife. You’re also a narcissist mother, daughter, sister, and human being. You’ll never admit this fact because you’ll never realize it. And that’s because you’re a narcissist.”

9. “If you hold onto hurt and anger, your children will have no normal parent. The narcissist parent will use them as puppets and abandon them. You are their only hope.”

10. “If you hold onto hurt and anger with a narcissist, the children will have no normal parent. The narcissistic parent will use them as puppets, lovebomb and abandon them. You are their only hope.”

If you hold onto hurt and anger with a narcissist, the children will have no normal parent

11. “Let me make sure that I’m understanding this correctly. You’re telling everyone that your ex ‘walked out on you and the kids’ and you plan on telling that same story to your kids when they’re older. But you intend on leaving out the part where you actually paid a lawyer to keep him from getting more overnights with his children. That makes all kinds of narcissistic sense!”

12. “Co-parenting with a narcissist can be done, but it isn’t easy.”

Inspirational Quotes About Co-Parenting

Although it may sometimes seem that cooperating with your ex-partner is impossible, you have to keep in mind that this is something that will make your kids happy. Here are some inspiring co-parenting quotes to keep you motivated.

1. “Co-parenting is not asking permission. It’s about discussing your child’s needs and wants and deciding what’s best.”

Co-parenting is not asking permission

2. “It is critical to maintain boundaries between adult problems and children. Please protect your children’s innocence and allow them to remain children. They must not be bound by adult problems. Kids don’t have the coping skills or the intellectual ability to understand worries, adult relationship issues, or their parent’s unhappiness.”

3. “Co-parenting with my ex is awesome! They’ve really become so mature and cooperative since our divorce, said no one ever!”

4. “Allow your children to be children. Don’t force them to choose between mummy and daddy.”

5. “Don’t stay together for the kids. They should grow up knowing what happiness and love are rather than misery and hate. Sincerely, the child of divorced, but happy parents.”

Don’t stay together for the kids.

6. “I co-parent with dignity and respect; I care for and support my children financially and emotionally; Children need this kind of parenting, no matter what.”

7. “To be honest, I am just winging it—life, motherhood, my eyeliner; everything.”

8. “Co-parenting is finding that a happy balance can take months if not years to find, and sometimes for some families, they never agree on anything. The main focus should be on children, their wellbeing, and happiness.”

9. “Make a positive difference in your children’s lives. Act and speak about your co-parent with respect and integrity.”

10. “Divorce and separation is a reality for millions of families. Co-parenting is a beautiful response that puts kids first.”

Divorce and separation is a reality for millions of families

11. “Co-parenting can be an incredibly positive experience for a child to witness two people who are able to co-parent with respect and healthy communication.”

12. “Even if parents are experiencing relationship discords and distress but are able to maintain a positive co-parenting relationship, adverse outcomes for children will be reduced.”

13. “To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today.”

14. “Shared parenting allies, not enemies! We should be on the same side working together doing the best for our kids, despite our differences.”

15. “How do you co-parent successfully after a difficult break-up? By loving your child more than you hate your ex. Support co-parenting. Your child will thank you for it.”

How do you co-parent successfully after a difficult break-up

16. “Anyone can have a child and call themselves parents. A real parent is someone who puts that child above their own selfish needs and wants.”

17. “Thumbs up to parents and step-parents who co-parent! Children need to feel safe and loved in both homes.”

18. “A child cannot have too many people who love them and want to help them succeed. Support Co-parenting!”

19. “The more co-parents communicate with one another about the children, the less likely small issues to grow into major problems. Select days/times for phone, email or in-person visits. Discuss in advance visitation transfer agreements. List who is responsible for what on each day, week or month.”

20. “You are not a bad mother! I’m sure all mothers neglect their kids and only claim them at tax time.”

I’m sure all mothers neglect their kids and only claim them at tax time

21. “Think of it as an important business project; you don’t always love the person that you’re working with, but you work together to get the project done. Co-parents need to adopt this same business model when co-parenting their children.”

22. “Keep calm and remember children need both parents.”

23. “No matter what your history, you and your co-parent may struggle to keep adult business away from the kids. Keep that conflict between the two of you as much as possible. It’s not easy, but if you want to promote a sense of safety and security, presenting a calm, united front will do wonders for your family.”

Family Quotes About Good Parenting

There are times when you hit rock bottom because you just cannot find peace with your ex. I believe those are the times when you need some good parenting advice. Let the following quotes about co-parenting empower you to move forward for your child’s sake.

1. “The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to respect the woman that gave birth to them. It is because of her that you have the greatest treasures in your life. You may have moved on, but your children have not.”

The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to respect the woman that gave birth to them

2. “Children are not possessions. You don’t ‘allow’ the father/mother extra time. When you say things like that, you imply that you think of your children as things, not humans.”

3. “The more co-parents with one another about the children, the less likely for small issues to grow into major problems. Select days/ time for phone, e-mail, or in-person visits. Discuss in advance visitation transfer agreements—list who’s responsible for what on each day, week, or month.”

4. “One tip that has always helped me is to keep it on a business level, rather than a personal level. You’re now in the business of raising these children with a person that no longer resides in your home.”

5. “Co-parenting can be difficult, but if two parents continue to have open and honest communication, that builds trust, which makes co-parenting easier for everyone.”

Co-parenting can be difficult, but if two parents continue to have open and honest communication, that builds trust, which makes co-parenting easier for everyone

6. “Good parenting allows children to experience the best things in their childhood that they must encounter in their lives.”

7. “Your children are watching you very, very closely. Showing your children that you can respect each other and resolve conflict respectfully will give them a good foundation for the conflict that arises in their own lives. Do your best to remain relaxed and focused, use a calm tone of voice, and a concerned facial expression when tensions rise.”

8. “Parents need to make peaceful co-parenting a real goal because the emotional wounds caused in the heart of a child can last a lifetime.”

9. “Effective parenting has nothing to do with pointing out our faults, and everything to do with working together for solutions.”

10. “Co-parenting is not hard if you just worry about the child and not the other parents’ business.”

Co-parenting is not hard if you just worry about the child and not the other parents’ business

11. “When you tell a child you hate their other parent, you are telling them you hate half of who they are.”

12. “Co-parenting becomes successful when your children feel like you and your partner are always there for them.”

13. “Bad mothers see no wrong in the way they treat their children.”

See also: 60 Best Bad Mom Quotes To Make Sure You’re A Good One!

Positive Co-Parenting Quotes

Here are some more positive quotes about parallel parenting to cheer you up in tough times.

1. “Co-parenting lets the kids experience the best things that they should encounter in their lives.”

Co-parenting lets the kids experience the best things that they should encounter in their lives.

2. “Co-parenting with an ex can be tough, but if you stay calm and keep your child’s needs in focus, your actions will always be sound, no matter how your co-parent might behave.”

3. “There is no such thing as a perfect parent. So just be a real one.”

4. “Easily overlooked, punctuality and politeness are crucial tools in the co-parent arsenal. Whether you’re lovers, best friends, or former enemies, it’s important to offer genuine thanks for your co-parent’s efforts when you can.”

5. “It took a long time to land at the co-parenting destination. I’m so glad we weather the storms and made it into the light.”

It took a long time to land at the co-parenting destination.

6. “A successful co-parenting relationship can only work between two people who are totally present and dedicated to their child/children despite outward distractions and the personal conflicts between them.”

7. “Co-parenting can allow us to fulfill our wishes while making sure the children are loved and taken care of.”

8. “Just remember that co-parenting can make you wish for another blissful life with your family.”

9. “Children need and deserve the love, care, and support of both parents.”

10. “Co-parenting can allow us to fulfill our wishes while making sure the children are loved and taken care of.”

Co-parenting can allow us to fulfill our wishes while making sure the children are loved and taken care of

11. “We care for each other and care about our family. And we are both working towards the same goal.”

12. “A healthy and positive co-parenting relationship is nothing short of a gift.”

13. “Co-parenting can show how we can achieve happiness for all the parents and their children.”

14. “The best security blanket a child can have is parents who respect each other.”

15. “Co-parenting will allow us to know about the shortcomings and troubles we can fix right now.”

Co-parenting will allow us to know about the shortcomings and troubles we can fix right now

16. “Blood doesn’t always make a parent; being a parent comes from the heart.”

17. “Co-parenting can make a positive difference in the lives of children. Speak about the co-parent with integrity and respect.”

18. “Bringing two families together is never easy. But in the end, it’s more than worth it.”

19. “Co-parenting has been a rollercoaster ride for sure, but neither of us ever got off the ride, thank goodness!”

20. “Let the world see that the wholeness of a family does not always have to equate to happiness in life.”

Let the world see that the wholeness of a family does not always have to equate to happiness in life

21. “Co-parenting is an eye-opener for the people who judge us on the whereabouts in the house.”

22. “Separation is a reality for millions of families. Co-parenting is a beautiful response that puts kids first.”

23. “Co-parenting is an example of how we can achieve happiness for all children and their parents.”

24. “Healthy co-parenting can have a positive impact on children’s mental health and help them grow into happy grown-ups.”

Life Quotes About Co-Parenting

1. “When you go for co-parenting, always keep in mind that you are not managing an inconvenience. You are raising another human being.”

When you go for co-parenting, always keep in mind that you are not managing an inconvenience

2. “People can forgive toxic parents, but they should do it at the conclusion—not at the beginning—of their emotional house cleaning. People need to get angry about what happened to them. They need to grieve over the fact that they never had the parental love they yearned for. They need to stop diminishing or discounting the damage that was done to them.”

3. “All of us develop our expectations about how people will treat us based on our relationships with our parents.”

4. “Co-parenting is not for the selfish or immature.”

5. “A family is a small world where all differences can be settled if we learn to accept and compromise.”

A family is a small world where all differences can be settled if we learn to accept and compromise

6. “Children soak up both verbal and nonverbal messages like sponges—indiscriminately. They listen to their parents, they watch their parents, and they imitate their parents’ behavior. Because they have little frame of reference outside the family, the things they learn at home about themselves and others become universal truths engraved deeply in their minds.”

7. “One of the hardest parts of co-parenting is missing your child when you don’t have them.”

8. “Kids need parents, not part-time visitors with a checkbook.”

9. “In order to be in your kids’ memories tomorrow, you must be in their lives today.”

10. “There will always be steps you can take toward unity in your blended family. You will make — one step at a time!”

There will always be steps you can take toward unity in your blended family

11. “Co-parenting is a way to grab responsibilities and raise your children to be better people.”

Wrapping It Up

As I said earlier, co-parenting can be tough. Many of the toxic co-parenting quotes from this article depict how messy things in a blended family can get.

However, your kids are the number one priority, so you must find the strength to be ready to deal with all the challenges. I hope this collection of toxic co-parenting quotes gave you a good dose of motivation to do so.

Until next time!

Read next: 60 Best Parenting Quotes For Hard Times To Inspire You

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